Superstars Top Four for 11/24/11

Shortly after watching this week’s episode a friend yelled at me for his having “wasted” an hour on this show. It was the first time he had watched Superstars in a long time. Did I force him to try to watch during a bad show? No, this was actually a better put together show than some have been of late, though like NXT they are falling into a lack of variety in matches. No, he said the matches were of a type that could be described as, “The crowd goes mild.”

People want wrestling, but it’s been proven time and again they want a story to go with their matches. As certain commentators *coughScottStanfordcough* try to give us a background to the matches many others simply commentate a match or talk about what is coming up in the WWE. If people simply wanted to watch men beat up one another they would watch boxing, or better (or worse depending on whose point of view you are looking from) UFC.

This particular blog is not a complaint on what WWE is doing wrong, though. This is the top four reasons to watch Superstars, and I’m sorry they were not enough to keep my friend interested. Is he jaded? Possibly. A lot of people spend their nights complaining about RAW but will tune in next week. Superstars should be the show to tune in to watch out of enjoyment.

4. Jinder Mahal vs. Trent Barreta

Sure, as soon as I saw Barreta come out I knew he was going to lose. With a heavy sigh I sat back to watch the match. Jinder had been on fire for a few weeks on Smackdown before they realized something crucial about him: his wrestling skill was sloppy. It was not necessarily bad but if he continued the way he was going he was going to hurt someone, and like many wrestlers before him who allowed themselves to grow sloppy, it would not be himself but his opponent. A match with Barreta is almost a free pass to be free and try out new things as Barreta has more control than most of the main eventers. Calm down, I didn’t say he was better (is he?) just claimed he has more control. He flops and flips like a pro and Jinder needs someone like him to practice on. This match shows how far Mahal has come and showcases a man who needs to find something to do on one of the flagship shows.

3. Drew McIntyre vs. Ted Dibiase

The focus for Dibiase on this episode is the Dibiase Posse Parties that are held outside of the arena. Hundreds of people go to see the man before he enters, just generally hanging out. Dibiase’s song needs to change, for Dibiase did not work in the Million Dollar Son character. Dibiase is a good actor, he even proved his acting chops in the second best WWE movie to date (The Marine 2 which Scott Stanford makes mention of, no The Marine would not be the first best). Dibiase needs to find something he is more comfortable with, and the Posse Partier and outdoorsman that he is might be something more relatable. Tonight he fights the brilliant McIntyre, who has managed to win one fight on Superstars in months, and it was against Morrison two weeks ago. Tonight is not the night he wins again. I am sad, but it is interesting to see Dibiase growing and perhaps finding his niche.

2. The threat of Tyson Kidd kicking Josh Mathews in the face

Okay, so the threat was only said by Striker. “Tyson Kidd said to me a couple of weeks ago that he got upset with you and I. He said that we spent too much time talking about twitter and not enough time talking about Tyson Kidd’s match. He said that if we do that again this week he’s going to come over here and kick you in the face.” I have to admit when I saw Tyson Kidd step out for the night I groaned knowing a twitter conversation was coming. No matter where Kidd seems to be the conversation always leads to twitter. This man deserves more than twitter conversation when he’s on screen and tonight he had it. I do not know what the real reason is Striker and Mathews were told to lay off, maybe it was Kidd, but I thank the person, from the bottom of my heart.

1. Scott Stanford

The return of the list sees Scott Stanford at the return to the top! The man with the plan, the commentator with the stories. Tonight he’s feeling fresh, no redundancy in lines and his usual upbeat enthusiasm. While there are no stories to tell this time around for his two groupings he does give background on the men in the ring to keep the listener intrigued. He is a major part of the reason the Dibiase match was as entertaining as it was because his words put the Dibiase Posse Partier over more than anything else. While people shout “Dibiase” from their seats Scott will make sure you take note. You may not even realize he’s manipulated you into wanting to root for the man until it is too late. That is how good he is.

Tonight Mathews gets some respect for starting an odd conversation. He mentioned he was at the Dibiase Posse Tailgating Party and said,

“We roasted a turducken.”
So Scott could reply, “A turducken? I love those things!”
“Get’s so excited.”
“All three in one. What is that, a-”
“A duck, a chicken, and a turkey, right.”
“I’ll tell ya what, if I was a goose I’d feel left out.”

Solace Superstars Scrutiny

As my issue was with NXT yesterday I have with Superstars today. There were only three matches making it difficult to have a top four things. Instead I’m just going to explore the aspects of the show.

The matches feature the usual suspects, the first match of the night being Justin Gabriel and Jinder Mahal. Justin Gabriel comes out sporting a hairstyle that reminds me of a stegosaurus and seems to be equally as durable. Despite rolling around on it even when it seems to start to go flat he flicks his wrist and POOF instead stego-hawk. Cool? Jinder comes out, with a mic, and gives his entire promo in a Punjabi dialect that gets him instant boos. Unfortunately Gabriel wins with the only move he has, which is a 450 Splash. I was impressed with this 450 Splash the first time I saw it with Gabriel because it was the first time I had seen it. Now I’ve seen several other wrestlers in other companies do the same thing… and better. Bored! But Jinder has grown solidly as a wrestler and while he’s still not one of my favorites I still enjoy watching him.

The second match of the evening moves us into the Raw portion, announced by the ever handsome Scott Stanford and that other guy he sits with. (Josh Mathews) The first match is Yoshi Tatus vs. Tyson Kidd. Yoshi is again sans face paint which is disappointing but these two put on a long match that never fails to entertain. However I kind of lose interest in a match when Mathews quips, “Their best feud so far has been on twitter.” Wait, what? So their in-ring work has not been their best feud? I know they are meant to push twitter but perhaps better wording would have been more succinct in this instance.

The last match of the night is Drew McIntyre vs. John Morrison. Would you believe that Drew McIntyre wins? Me either, but it’s true! That’s all that needs to be said here. I love Morrison but McIntyre deserved the win and the two men looked good in this match and made this win a step up for McIntyre, even if Morrison has been their own “loser” of late.

The last aspect is the aspect that is always my favorite part of the show, which is Scott Stanford. It was almost like a different man sitting out there. Almost. Is he still the one who calls the best during matches, of course? And he did seem to be getting a little Not PG? (“When those two were involved years ago-” “The last time these two hooked up-” “Unbelievable back and forth action!”) Which could just be a nod to us twitter crowd who constantly listen for those little things. He was full of excitement and still is the only man I think concentrates more on the men out in the ring than anything else going on around him. He had a few of his usual good lines, “And I quote… from Yoshi Tatsu,” and, “Is he looking for Hornswoggle, what’s Drew doing under there?” Still, my darling commentator seemed to not be himself. I look forward to the goofy lines that sell the show, and while tonight’s matches held up on their own, I hope next week sees the return of that same loveable man!

Superstars 10/20/11

Every week I come out with the top 4 reasons to watch the lesser known shows. Last week for Superstars I could only come up with three. This week I’m not even going to bother. This was the week where I was with the rest of the crowds understanding what is chasing people away from watching this show.

We start off the show with Jinder Mahal and Ted Dibiase. Even the piped in sounds don’t bother trying to be enthusiastic. Jack Korpela tries to save this match by showing his usual enthusiasm that only Korpela can muster every week. His enthusiasm might not be on par with my favorite commentator’s, but he tries every week to tell the story in the ring.

I can honestly say I’m not sure if Matt Striker is bored with the match in front of him or just told he has to mention the pay-per-view X amount of times during the match. Listening to Striker is a recap of Raw and a preview to the pay-per-view. While Striker is excellent when calling a match I don’t need the recap. The people who watch Superstars have watched Raw. And likely NXT. And will watch Smackdown. And the pay-per-view. These are the die-hard fans. Give them more of what they want.

After a match that I could not get motivated for we switch to the Raw portion of the evening which brings out Santino vs. Heath Slater. This match is to be Slater’s embarrassment before he is suspended because for some reason all of the wrestlers that are suspended need their embarrassment before going off screen. What better way to embarrass a man than letting him lose to Santino? Except Santino is incredibly popular, even if his new coif of hair is a little disturbing. This was probably my favorite match of the night and the one that our announcers for Raw (Scott Stanford and Josh Mathews) seemed to appreciate the most.

The last match of the evening is Air Boom (Evan Bourne and Kofi Kingston in case you stopped watching WWE in the last few weeks) vs. Drew McIntyre and Michael McGuillicutty. You already know who is going to lose because, honestly, when was the last time Drew didn’t lose? This match could not hold my interest. I kept straining to hear the commentary in hopes that it would save the match and even Mathews and Stanford’s play at animosity could not save it. The two of them seemed as bored as I was feeling. This can’t possibly be a good sign.

Perhaps I am reading too much into it? I listen to Stanford’s commentary every week, three or four times. I pick out his best lines of the night. I make comments on the clothing he wears. I take screen caps of the man! So why did I feel like neither he nor Mathews wanted to be calling this last match?

WWE had future endeavored Superstars from wwe.com only to turn around and bring it back two weeks later. Once they brought it back they only seemed to make the show progressively worse. Once again they seem to be anti-themselves. They were going to show it on the WWE Network, we would get it then. Then they turn around and bring it back and make it a more sub-par imitation of itself. Is this supposed to be what whets our appetites and makes us salivate for more? They are lucky they have Stanford or I might decide I have something better to do Thursday nights.

Best part of the evening was this exchange between Mathews and Stanford:
“One too many chimichangas for me, but other than that I’ve been having a ball.” “I spent the week trying to avoid hanging out with you.” “I noticed, I called you a few times.” “My phone doesn’t work down here.” “Very convenient.”

Other memorable Stanford quotes this episode:
“By the way, I really love the word chimichanga so is it all right if I just throw it in a few times?”

“Senoritas and margaritas.”

“Santino, staying alive once again.”

“Hook of the leg, no! Still can’t get to three.”

About Slater: “It’s amazing that he hangs out with Axle Rose. I used to love Journey.” Josh’s snort in retaliation to this tickled me pink. “Nah, I’m kidding, you kidding? Guns N’ Roses one of my favorites. Don’t stop believing, my friend.”

“That’s gotta do it!”