Solace’s Scathing Scrutiny of Superstars 2/2/12
Superstars was going downhill. Many of you will tell me it had already hit rock bottom and had started digging, but I could not lose hope! Sure, a lot of my hope and faith relied on Scott Stanford, but I need this show to succeed for other reasons. One, because wrestling should matter. Superstars, for awhile, had tried to put a story into the show, but has since given up on it. It relies on the commentators for story and even they seem to sit there sometimes going, “I have no clue why Jinder Mahal and Yoshi Tatsu would be wrestling.” Hey, me either.
Jinder Mahal vs. Yoshi Tatsu
See, I was not pulling random matches out of my backside. Mahal vs. Tatsu. Things that make you go, “What the Hell?” Why does Mahal need Tatsu? Tatsu is awesome, fun in the ring and outside, but Mahal is getting a big push and Tatsu is only vaguely remembered on NXT. Oh wait, Mahal has been losing and they still need to push him. So, he can win against Tatsu. Mahal wins with the submission he always uses, a camel clutch. (Hey, I’m learning things!) It’s a nifty move, but what happens when he goes to win a match and can’t use a submission? Interesting match, but I did not get a story out of it. At all.
Kelly Kelly and Alicia Fox vs. The Bella Twins
“Well, my new favorite color is obviously teal.” And Scott makes his first of many good lines for the evening. The Bella Twins are in their teal catsuits that they wore during the Rumble. Now, I love the Bellas and I love their catsuits, but they almost seem ill-fitting. But this is not a fashion blog so I will not complain about how it makes them look like they have no curves and shows off their backside more than their assets. And that they are too pretty to wear clothing worse than the other divas. Right, where was I? Alicia Fox wrestled, again. I wish this match would make up for the debacle of a match she was in on NXT but no, Kelly Kelly did most of the work. The only thing Alicia did was get picked on by the Bellas. “Double booty shake to the back of the head.” Yeah, I’ll pass.
R-Truth vs. Jack Swagger
I will admit it. I was looking forward to this match. Vickie coming out with Swagger made it bigger, to be honest. It showed it was a story, it showed this was not just a match for the sake of a match. I love Vickie, she has such– wait, did she just tell Scott to call her? I will claw her eyes out! Stay away from him, he’s– Oh, sorry, where was I? Yes, R-Truth and Jack Swagger. R-Truth is not the best wrestler, but he has one of the better characters which follows him into the ring (get it?). Swagger does well as the United States Champion and being full of himself. The best part is Scott becomes derisive towards someone for what might be the first time. He tells us that Swagger is claiming to be the best United States Champion ever. Scott retorts, “Premature? You think?” I am a huge fan of Swagger, but I like that this was in character for Scott, as one of Ryder’s number one broskis. Awesome tie-in to an awesome match that ends with R-Truth getting the pin.
Okay, so it still became a blog about Scott Stanford, but you knew this would happen. It’s me.